"Screaming Children Will NOT Be Tolerated" reads the sign hanging in the window of the Olde Salty diner in North Carolina. The owner states simply, patrons want to enjoy their dinner without having to listen to kids scream. She isn't saying children aren't welcome, but if your little one begins to fuss and flail take him/her outside, deal with the issue, and then you, and your now placated little one are welcome to return.
The story about this diner owner and her controversial sign broke last week on every major news channel, morning show, and news blog- and there were quite a few folks who were, well, basically outraged.
One mother, of an autistic child, even claimed the sign was downright discriminatory to those with disabilities.
Of course, legally the diner owner can put up any sign she wants, as long as it in no way interferes with the constitutional rights of others, but I want to know how you mothers out there feel about this issue: Would you find the sign offensive and avoid eating at any establishment with the audacity to post it? Or do you agree- if your child acts up, take them out?
Let me know, then I'll tell you what I think!
Showing posts with label children. Show all posts
Showing posts with label children. Show all posts
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Monday, August 2, 2010
Recession
Times are tough! From bankers to beauticians, dentists to delivery men, it seems almost everyone is struggling financially right now. Our economy is not the worst it has ever been , but we can all, no doubt, feel the current recession taking its toll on our lifestyles.
During these times of economic strain there are two crucial things to remember: First, teach children responsibility without passing on your own financial worry to them, and second, always continue to honor God with your giving.
Children have a limited time during which they can live life free of adult anxiety- their time to pay bills and fret the rising cost of dairy is rapidly approaching. So, its important to teach them to save and spend responsibly with a consistent allowance, and by setting a good example with your own spending habits (this one is tough for me, especially when Macy's is having a sale.)
Sharing too much about the family's economic state and potential financial difficulties (i.e. 'I hope I don't lose my job,' or 'I hope we can make the house payment') may cause children to feel anxiety and worry that is unnecessary and definitely out of their control. Make them aware of any necessary financial changes the family must make as a whole, (like only ordering out for pizza once a month instead of once a week,) but continue to also make them aware that God is in control and He will always provide for His children. Share your faith in God, (Jehovah-Jireh, our provider) with them and help them use this faith to overcome any doubt and anxiety. Do this by consistently thanking Him for what He has done for you and your family, focusing on the things you do have and by recognizing Him as the ultimate Provider for all things great and small!
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink... Is not life more important than food? Look at the birds of the air; Your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" (Matthew 6:25a, 26-27)
Also, no matter what, always give. Tithing is not something to do when there is extra money at the end of the month or just on special 'religious' holidays, it is something we do because God instructs us to tithe and we show Him our love and honor by obeying His commands.
"Be sure to set aside a tenth of all that your fields produce each year." (Deuteronomy 14:22) Being charitable sets a good example for our children and allows us to share God' love and compassion with others!
During these times of economic strain there are two crucial things to remember: First, teach children responsibility without passing on your own financial worry to them, and second, always continue to honor God with your giving.
Children have a limited time during which they can live life free of adult anxiety- their time to pay bills and fret the rising cost of dairy is rapidly approaching. So, its important to teach them to save and spend responsibly with a consistent allowance, and by setting a good example with your own spending habits (this one is tough for me, especially when Macy's is having a sale.)
Sharing too much about the family's economic state and potential financial difficulties (i.e. 'I hope I don't lose my job,' or 'I hope we can make the house payment') may cause children to feel anxiety and worry that is unnecessary and definitely out of their control. Make them aware of any necessary financial changes the family must make as a whole, (like only ordering out for pizza once a month instead of once a week,) but continue to also make them aware that God is in control and He will always provide for His children. Share your faith in God, (Jehovah-Jireh, our provider) with them and help them use this faith to overcome any doubt and anxiety. Do this by consistently thanking Him for what He has done for you and your family, focusing on the things you do have and by recognizing Him as the ultimate Provider for all things great and small!
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink... Is not life more important than food? Look at the birds of the air; Your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" (Matthew 6:25a, 26-27)
Also, no matter what, always give. Tithing is not something to do when there is extra money at the end of the month or just on special 'religious' holidays, it is something we do because God instructs us to tithe and we show Him our love and honor by obeying His commands.
"Be sure to set aside a tenth of all that your fields produce each year." (Deuteronomy 14:22) Being charitable sets a good example for our children and allows us to share God' love and compassion with others!
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Watching Our Children Grow
As my son continues to grow and gain Independence, I have only one choice: sit back and watch nature take its course. As time passes our relationship evolves. The baby that needed constant coddling, feeding, and nurturing is now the little boy that still needs constant feeding, less conspicuous nurturing, and intermittent coddling. His needs change- mostly with him needing me less and needing to exercise his autonomy more.
In the moments when this metamorphosis, showcasing his self-sufficiency, stare me in the eye, daring me to challenge the natural order of growing up, all I can do is relent and marvel at the amazing young man slowly forming in front of me. Strong cheekbones replace the once chubby, ever-pinchable cheeks and short, straight, dark layers take the place of his bouncing, caramel colored ringlets.
Now, don't get me wrong, as he gets older I discover new joys every day, and I feel an overwhelming sense of excitement thinking about the man he will become.
But there are a few things I really miss! Like the times when he is happy, tired, frightened by the thunder, or sad, and it seemed the only thing his little arms could do was just cling to me- knowing that in my arms he will find safety, rest, familiarity, and most of all, love. Part of growing up is him relying less on that familiar physical comfort to soothe his tears and him beginning to work things out for himself. And although he still comes to me often baring his emotions, those times when he just clung to me, like I was the only thing in his world that could sufficiently offer him peace, are fewer and farther between.
Thinking about this made me think about my own relationship with my Heavenly Father, my 'Abba' God. How often do I cling to Him, taking peace and comfort in His safety and unconditional love?
When I was a 'young' Christian I ran to Him often, sharing excitement, offering praise, and seeking solace. Now, I seem to take His strength and ever-open arms for granted.
I know God takes pleasure in watching His children grow, becoming stronger and more mature. But just as we, as parents, will always cherish those moments when our children still surrender to their innate, overwhelming need to find reprieve and peace solely in our arms, I can only imagine how much more our Father cherishes the moments we cling to Him with complete faith and utter abandon.
"The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms" (Deuteronomy 33:27.)
In the moments when this metamorphosis, showcasing his self-sufficiency, stare me in the eye, daring me to challenge the natural order of growing up, all I can do is relent and marvel at the amazing young man slowly forming in front of me. Strong cheekbones replace the once chubby, ever-pinchable cheeks and short, straight, dark layers take the place of his bouncing, caramel colored ringlets.
Now, don't get me wrong, as he gets older I discover new joys every day, and I feel an overwhelming sense of excitement thinking about the man he will become.
But there are a few things I really miss! Like the times when he is happy, tired, frightened by the thunder, or sad, and it seemed the only thing his little arms could do was just cling to me- knowing that in my arms he will find safety, rest, familiarity, and most of all, love. Part of growing up is him relying less on that familiar physical comfort to soothe his tears and him beginning to work things out for himself. And although he still comes to me often baring his emotions, those times when he just clung to me, like I was the only thing in his world that could sufficiently offer him peace, are fewer and farther between.
Thinking about this made me think about my own relationship with my Heavenly Father, my 'Abba' God. How often do I cling to Him, taking peace and comfort in His safety and unconditional love?
When I was a 'young' Christian I ran to Him often, sharing excitement, offering praise, and seeking solace. Now, I seem to take His strength and ever-open arms for granted.
I know God takes pleasure in watching His children grow, becoming stronger and more mature. But just as we, as parents, will always cherish those moments when our children still surrender to their innate, overwhelming need to find reprieve and peace solely in our arms, I can only imagine how much more our Father cherishes the moments we cling to Him with complete faith and utter abandon.
"The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms" (Deuteronomy 33:27.)
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Praying For Our Children
As parents, especially mothers, we often find ourselves wearing many different hats and filling many different roles. During the course of a typical day I, like most of you, usually play the part of short-order-cook, event planner, coach, referee, housekeeper, and now that summer is in full swing, lifeguard and dermatologist. (You should see some of the sunburns and mosquito bites I've treated this summer!)
Every role we play, and hat we wear, in our children's lives is equally important, except for one. This is the hat we pull on after our kids are in bed, dishes done and homework completed- the one we wear not for them, but on their behalf. It is the one we wear not with our children, or doing for our children, but when we hit our knees before God to pray for our children!
Our petitions for guidance, strength, safety, and blessings are more necessary and life-altering to our children than anything we could ever 'do' for them. This is so easy to lose sight of as we hurry through our days swamped with chores and tasks. And more often than not, these duties leave us completely exhausted at the end of the day with little, or no, energy to spare.
But don't hang up your hat yet! Take the time to wear the most important one of all, the one that will affect your child for eternity. Clear your head of stress and hit your knees! Taking the time to pray will ensure that all life's tasks go smoother for you and your family.
There is such an awesome peace in knowing that your worries and concerns for your children have been turned over to God. He is the ultimate protector and provider and the Bible tells us "those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength." (Isa. 40:31a)
So regardless of the number of hats you have already worn for the day, or the number of tasks you have accomplished, take the time to pray. It is the only way we can truly re-charge, allowing us to wake up again tomorrow and joyfully pull on the first hat of a great new day.
Every role we play, and hat we wear, in our children's lives is equally important, except for one. This is the hat we pull on after our kids are in bed, dishes done and homework completed- the one we wear not for them, but on their behalf. It is the one we wear not with our children, or doing for our children, but when we hit our knees before God to pray for our children!
Our petitions for guidance, strength, safety, and blessings are more necessary and life-altering to our children than anything we could ever 'do' for them. This is so easy to lose sight of as we hurry through our days swamped with chores and tasks. And more often than not, these duties leave us completely exhausted at the end of the day with little, or no, energy to spare.
But don't hang up your hat yet! Take the time to wear the most important one of all, the one that will affect your child for eternity. Clear your head of stress and hit your knees! Taking the time to pray will ensure that all life's tasks go smoother for you and your family.
There is such an awesome peace in knowing that your worries and concerns for your children have been turned over to God. He is the ultimate protector and provider and the Bible tells us "those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength." (Isa. 40:31a)
So regardless of the number of hats you have already worn for the day, or the number of tasks you have accomplished, take the time to pray. It is the only way we can truly re-charge, allowing us to wake up again tomorrow and joyfully pull on the first hat of a great new day.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Back To School
As the vibrant, cobalt evenings of summer begin to fade, the crisp breezes of Fall drift in and bring with them the excitement of Friday night football, freshly sharpened pencils, new spiral notebooks waiting to be filled and a certain bittersweet anticipation that comes only once a year.
We send our children back to school with our spoken (and unspoken) expectations chipping away at their lazy day memories of summer. We load their backpacks with school supplies and their souls with the important life lessons and the indispensable values we hope will protect and prepare them for another year.
Whether your child is an accomplished athlete, merit scholar, or star of the drama department, the most significant lesson you can ever teach them is the same: "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord. . ." (Colossians 3:23)
Motivate your children to do well in school- not just to get into a great college or win a scholarship (although those things are wonderful) but to bring honor to God.
With the uncontainable presence of the Holy Spirit permeating everything we do, what we do well becomes our sacrificial offering to the Lord, for His glory!
Every task, no matter how small or seemingly inconsequential, when done with a true spirit of worship, also becomes a tangible testimonial bearing witness to God's own inherent goodness.
"Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one of you for whatever good you do. . . " (Ephesians 6:7-8)
Making an effort to do your best at every task placed before you requires quite a commitment, but by helping your children view tonight's homework as an opportunity to serve God, you will encourage their hard work and keep them motivated. When your children know they are not only pleasing you, the parent, but also God their enthusiasm will naturally increase.
"So. . .whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." (1 Corinthians 10:31) As we begin another school year, take a minute to say a prayer with your children and thank the Lord for all the new and exciting ways to serve Him!
We send our children back to school with our spoken (and unspoken) expectations chipping away at their lazy day memories of summer. We load their backpacks with school supplies and their souls with the important life lessons and the indispensable values we hope will protect and prepare them for another year.
Whether your child is an accomplished athlete, merit scholar, or star of the drama department, the most significant lesson you can ever teach them is the same: "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord. . ." (Colossians 3:23)
Motivate your children to do well in school- not just to get into a great college or win a scholarship (although those things are wonderful) but to bring honor to God.
With the uncontainable presence of the Holy Spirit permeating everything we do, what we do well becomes our sacrificial offering to the Lord, for His glory!
Every task, no matter how small or seemingly inconsequential, when done with a true spirit of worship, also becomes a tangible testimonial bearing witness to God's own inherent goodness.
"Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one of you for whatever good you do. . . " (Ephesians 6:7-8)
Making an effort to do your best at every task placed before you requires quite a commitment, but by helping your children view tonight's homework as an opportunity to serve God, you will encourage their hard work and keep them motivated. When your children know they are not only pleasing you, the parent, but also God their enthusiasm will naturally increase.
"So. . .whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." (1 Corinthians 10:31) As we begin another school year, take a minute to say a prayer with your children and thank the Lord for all the new and exciting ways to serve Him!
Friday, August 28, 2009
Teaching Graciousness
Waiting in line is never fun, especially for children! So imagine our frustration the other night as two energetic little boys pushed passed my son, his friend and me to bounce in the inflatable 'moonwalk' after we had all been waiting for our turn patiently for what seemed like an eternity.
There were about thirty other people in the line (it was a fairly large event celebrating the close of the Little League season,) but it just happened that these boys 'broke' right in front of us. No one else really noticed, except the father and son standing directly behind us in the line.
In perfect unison my son turned toward me and the boy behind us turned toward his father looking for an explanation and some sort of discipline for the aforementioned offenders. While I was quickly trying to piece together a reply that would sound good, re-instate justice and hide my own annoyance towards the 'line-breakers,' I heard the father behind us simply reply, 'Son, be gracious.'
Wow! What an answer, I thought. In our fast-paced, 'me-first' world how often do we allow grace to shine through our anger, frustration and general indignation towards others who don't behave exactly the way we think they should?
The notion of 'turning the other cheek' has become an antiquated expression reserved for Sunday school and Bible stories. Our society often misinterprets graciousness and kindness as weakness and associates those who don't fight back or do go out of their way for others with such negative descriptions as being a 'doormat' or 'pushover.'
But exhibiting grace is usually much more difficult and requires a greater amount of personal strength and character than giving in to our inevitable feelings of irritation, anger or annoyance.
"Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse... If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." (Romans 12:10,13b,14,17,18)
Living out these Biblical principles is far from easy, especially when it feels like everything and everyone in this world is on a crash course to derail even our best intentions. But I always try to remember the profound amounts of grace and mercy given to me by my Heavenly Father during those times I know I least deserve it. Graciousness is a gift- passed down from God to us and from us to the world, 'line-breakers' and all!
There were about thirty other people in the line (it was a fairly large event celebrating the close of the Little League season,) but it just happened that these boys 'broke' right in front of us. No one else really noticed, except the father and son standing directly behind us in the line.
In perfect unison my son turned toward me and the boy behind us turned toward his father looking for an explanation and some sort of discipline for the aforementioned offenders. While I was quickly trying to piece together a reply that would sound good, re-instate justice and hide my own annoyance towards the 'line-breakers,' I heard the father behind us simply reply, 'Son, be gracious.'
Wow! What an answer, I thought. In our fast-paced, 'me-first' world how often do we allow grace to shine through our anger, frustration and general indignation towards others who don't behave exactly the way we think they should?
The notion of 'turning the other cheek' has become an antiquated expression reserved for Sunday school and Bible stories. Our society often misinterprets graciousness and kindness as weakness and associates those who don't fight back or do go out of their way for others with such negative descriptions as being a 'doormat' or 'pushover.'
But exhibiting grace is usually much more difficult and requires a greater amount of personal strength and character than giving in to our inevitable feelings of irritation, anger or annoyance.
"Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse... If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." (Romans 12:10,13b,14,17,18)
Living out these Biblical principles is far from easy, especially when it feels like everything and everyone in this world is on a crash course to derail even our best intentions. But I always try to remember the profound amounts of grace and mercy given to me by my Heavenly Father during those times I know I least deserve it. Graciousness is a gift- passed down from God to us and from us to the world, 'line-breakers' and all!
Thursday, August 27, 2009
The Importance of Patience
Have you ever noticed how the extreme rise in temperature seems to seriously diminish our tolerance levels? There appears to be an indirect correlation between the heat and our patience. One goes up and the other goes way down.
Mothers, who just last December happily stood in line for hours just to see Santa, now are pulling hair and throwing Tae-Bo punches just to get the best chairs at the pool. Well, maybe not that extreme, but I have definitely noticed a spike in road rage and indignant scowls where smiles used to sit.
Patience is crucial when raising little ones and completely necessary in discipline. It eliminates the risk of emotionally based decision making, i.e., allowing anger to steal our focus and not using our mistakes, or our children's, as opportunities to learn and grow. It is important not only to be patient with our children, but with others as well. The examples we set today dictate our children's behavior tomorrow.
Ephesians 4:2 instructs us to "be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."
This is a tall order-especially at the end of a long day. (I know its difficult to maintain a tolerant disposition when your child spills Kool-Aid for the tenth time in one day. Or asks for the millionth time why 6 year-olds can't see R-rated movies.) But these are the times when we need to rely on God's love and patience the most. Through His grace we can accept the peace He offers, allowing us to be less affected by daily struggles and the things that normally frustrate us.
Creating a stable, steadfast environment not only gives our children the secure foundation they need; it also gives us an opportunity to bear witness to the consistency of God in their lives. He is the same from season to season and His love and patience endure forever (Psalm 136.)
Every time I feel my fuse getting shorter I think about the amazing gift of God's patience, and all the times He is patient me, regardless of the amount of traffic or the temperature outside. The little things that bother us throughout our day are just that- little things. There is so much to be grateful for, including God's unconditional love and patience!
Mothers, who just last December happily stood in line for hours just to see Santa, now are pulling hair and throwing Tae-Bo punches just to get the best chairs at the pool. Well, maybe not that extreme, but I have definitely noticed a spike in road rage and indignant scowls where smiles used to sit.
Patience is crucial when raising little ones and completely necessary in discipline. It eliminates the risk of emotionally based decision making, i.e., allowing anger to steal our focus and not using our mistakes, or our children's, as opportunities to learn and grow. It is important not only to be patient with our children, but with others as well. The examples we set today dictate our children's behavior tomorrow.
Ephesians 4:2 instructs us to "be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."
This is a tall order-especially at the end of a long day. (I know its difficult to maintain a tolerant disposition when your child spills Kool-Aid for the tenth time in one day. Or asks for the millionth time why 6 year-olds can't see R-rated movies.) But these are the times when we need to rely on God's love and patience the most. Through His grace we can accept the peace He offers, allowing us to be less affected by daily struggles and the things that normally frustrate us.
Creating a stable, steadfast environment not only gives our children the secure foundation they need; it also gives us an opportunity to bear witness to the consistency of God in their lives. He is the same from season to season and His love and patience endure forever (Psalm 136.)
Every time I feel my fuse getting shorter I think about the amazing gift of God's patience, and all the times He is patient me, regardless of the amount of traffic or the temperature outside. The little things that bother us throughout our day are just that- little things. There is so much to be grateful for, including God's unconditional love and patience!
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